Blog, Faith, Homeschooling, Marriage, prayer, Writing

Work/family harmony: Your family can’t be replaced

Our youngest daughter Leah

Yesterday I shared about Ray cooking better than me and that two are better than one. Today I wanted to share about the precious gift of our kids. This morning I had a message in my Facebook inbox from a friend, a fellow writer/speaker/coach. She and I have similar exciting plans for a group coaching class in January 2012 and other ideas for the new year. (Stay tuned here!)  I think we’re a powerful team putting our brains together. 🙂

She and I were talking about balance:  taking care of your family, grocery shopping, doing errands, and other daily tasks, while successfully running a business.She has been busy with taking her kids to parties, buying groceries and going on a date with her man, and wasn’t sure if she would be able to do an online workshop like she wanted to this month or next. She wondered how others “do it all.”

>Here is what I shared with her today: “Your family can’t be replaced. I have many, many regrets over lost, wasted time, being too busy at times and not savoring precious moments with my kids…now our youngest is almost grown. Workshops can wait….just remember your priorities, do the next thing God says to do, one step at a time, and don’t compare yourself with others who seem to be “doing it all”…you are beautiful, uniquely you. Also, “doing it all” is just an illusion.”

We have a limited window of time with our children while they are still at home. Empty nest comes all too soon. Truly they grow up in a blink of the eye. I don’t believe that God wants mothers to put their entire lives on hold when they have children, making their kids the center of their lives, never taking time for themselves, finding hobbies, getting more training or education, or finding out who they really are besides a mom. In those cases where the woman revolves her whole life around her children, when the kids grow up the mother is completely lost, having a major identity crisis.

I have a friend in this situation right now. She has always been a stay at home mom and homeschooled her children, and now her kids have flown the nest – and her husband moved out when they did, saying he doesn’t want to be married to her anymore. “Beth, what am I supposed to do now?” she asked me recently. “I don’t know what to do!” She needs to find out who she really is, apart from being a wife and a mother. God created her for a great purpose.

>What I am saying, though, is to not let time pass without cherishing your time with your kids. Make sure you spend time each day with them and let them know how much you love them. Take time out for your marriage, before your kids grow up and you’re facing a stranger across the kitchen table with nothing in common and nothing to talk about.

>Don’t let your business take over your life, like some hideous, out of control monster like The Blob. Don’t let your family feel like they are second place -or last – next to your business. God brought these precious ones into your life to love.

Maintain harmony between your family, your home, your friends, your business, and other areas of your life.

So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom. – Psalm 90:12, ESV

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